Is This A Gyno Exam or Job Application?

It truly amazes me how hard you are judged when you are searching for employment these days. If you have gaps in your resume, shame on you! Employers seem to want your feet in the stirrups so they can examine your life’s history before they’ll even speak to you. Most chances, your resume won’t even be seen by human eyes if you don’t pass the list of “key words” they’re looking for. They want no gaps. If you have them, they consider you a loser that can’t hold down a job for very long. Are you kidding me???

I have gaps in my resume. I didn’t put down every job I’ve had to take to survive. Well, shame on me, right? I don’t think so. In 1999, Valentine’s weekend, I stood by my sister’s bed as she took her last breath. She was the only person that knew I felt I had to file for divorce. She knew I’d be strong enough to survive with 2 children on my own. In order to get out of this abusive marriage, I was forced to walk away from all of the financial security we had built as a couple. I had no choice, if I wanted to do what was “best for the children”, and so I did. I took a job as a housekeeper for a local furniture gallery and I kept trying to improve my employment from there. But then our country was attacked and everything changed. Jobs were harder to find, foreclosures were everywhere and people became desperate and frightened.

Yes, I have gaps and I am proud of them. Those gaps have made me stronger and better. I have never had to do anything immoral to survive and it has certainly not been easy. What they want is a background check, a credit history check, a drug/alcohol test, a driving record check. They want you to take an “assessment” test so they can sum you up and see if you’re a worthy candidate. They want perfect. Come on, even God knows there’s no such thing! Do they ask if you’ve ever helped a complete stranger out of the kindness of your heart, because you could? No. Do they ask if you’ve ever helped teach a child to read because their parents were too busy working multiple jobs and couldn’t? No. Do they ask if you’ve ever helped feed the homeless with your poverty income, because your kids would still eat, and you could make it work? No. I’ve never had anyone watching my back other than myself. I was my children’s sole provider, their normalcy, their stability. I was their Santa Claus.

No, cleaning toilets is not a glamorous job. But, you do what you have to do to pay the mortgage and, hopefully, not have to sell your soul to the devil to do so. My background check will be clean. My credit history is excellent. My drug/alcohol test will be clear. My driving record is spotless. As for the assessment test, I’m not sure about that one. I just don’t get how they think they can sum a person up based on the questions they ask on those. I don’t trust that part, sorry.

I am a team player. I enjoy helping others. I have a great sense of humor. I am proud of having been able to pay the mortgage every month for the past 17 years, never missing one or paying one late. I am grateful for what I have, 2 beautiful young adult children that truly care about the world as well as others living in it. They feel fortunate to be together for the holidays, regardless whether there are gifts under the tree or not. So, you see, it is true that until you’ve walked a day in the life of another, you really don’t know that individual or what they are made of. I am smart enough to know that there is no such thing as “perfect” or “fair”. I am smart enough to know that no matter how much insurance you have, there are no guarantees in life. I am able to think while standing or sitting and I possess common sense. I am a positive energy and will remain a hopeful human being.

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9 thoughts on “Is This A Gyno Exam or Job Application?

  1. I love this post for the Simple fact that it sums up how great of a person you truly are! I am SOOOO happy that you are blogging & writing! It lets you express yourself just like music, painting, etc… It is also very therapeutic & relaxing.
    This post shows that you don’t need to be perfect & I love that! Because you’re damn right that NO ONE is perfect. No one!!!
    And you have to be an incredible mother & women to support yourself & two young kids. No one should be judged for what they had to do to get by! I agree that I would Rather hear all the good someone did instead of what looks good on paper. Basically, I want to hear about the gaps!
    Keep up the awesome work, Donna! I look forward to you next post. Xoxo

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  2. You are 100% right. I didn’t put my health care jobs on my apps for factory work…it’s been 16 years since I’ve worked in a factory and I can still do they work..but..I don’t think employers think that way.
    They need to meet and talk to you and they will see the person you are. They will see a smart and beautiful person who is willing and able to work.

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    1. The hardest part is getting face-to-face. Technology has taken over & the entire search process is very cold. You are completely judged based on your resume & there’s a great deal that is not disclosed there. Real people know this, computers do not.

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  3. I’m glad I had time to read this before I went to bed tonight, been a busy and long day but this was all so heart warming it’s a great way to end the day. ❤

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